In March 2015, despite the challenging weather conditions of the previous year, I embarked on a cycling journey. This week, I cycled to the office for three of my five trips, covering a distance of 18 miles each way. The arduous nature of these rides necessitated a significant level of physical fitness.
The wind conditions further exacerbated the challenges, with gusts exceeding 10 to 15 mph on several days.
Interestingly, during these solitary rides, my mind often wanders, revisiting past experiences. I recall a friend who shared that he frequently relived powerful childhood memories while running. This week, I found myself revisiting several past relationship experiences that had left a profound impact on me. While they may not be universally considered horrors, they were certainly moments of significant emotional upheaval.
One particularly vivid memory involves a relationship I had with a woman for approximately two years. At the time, I believed we were an ideal match. However, I questioned whether I truly comprehended the concept of perfect compatibility. One day, unexpectedly, she informed me that she no longer wished to maintain our relationship. This revelation deeply saddened me. We had engaged in extensive discussions about the possibility of a lifelong partnership just weeks prior. Although the topic of marriage was never explicitly mentioned, there were subtle insinuations that we had contemplated a long-term commitment. In an instant, our relationship came to an end.
Approximately six weeks after the incident, I continued with my life, attempting to put the situation behind me. However, one day, I received a message on the code-a-phone (if you recall that device). The sender expressed her feelings, stating that it was inappropriate for me to leave and that I should contact her. Overwhelmed with excitement, I rushed to a local jewelry store and purchased a ring.
Upon arriving at her workplace, Ember’s restaurant, I presented her with the ring. To my surprise, she appeared visibly upset. I explained that her voice message had instructed me to call her. This revelation elicited laughter from her, causing me to feel embarrassed.
Later, I discovered that she had intended to contact me and wanted to confirm our continued friendship. I was deeply distressed by the events that transpired. Consequently, we ceased to communicate regularly. I chose to distance myself from him, or instead, I was overcome with shame and embarrassment, making it difficult for me to seek him out again.
During a recent bicycle ride to work, I experienced a significant recurrence of the events that transpired on that day. As I pedaled, I reflected on the positive outcome of the situation. When confronted with negative experiences, I tend to be excessively critical of myself and engage in self-deprecating thoughts. While there have been instances of nightmares that I regret, there are still others that I wish I could erase.
Do any of you understand what I mean as we reminisce about our pasts? Every time I think about it, I find more and more blessings in things that I thought were the most devastating events in my life. I only wish that I could come to peace with everything before I finally reach the end of my life.
My ride to work this morning was uneventful. It was slightly colder than I had anticipated, but easier than it was last week. I feel stronger. This was only the fifth ride of the year and the fourth work commute of 2015. Based on the forecast, this may be the last day for a while. The cold weather is returning. What is concerning is that it is often well below 30 degrees Fahrenheit in the morning, and I find it difficult to breathe in the colder weather. I will need to consult a physician as my shortness of breath is not improving.
After a productive day at the office, I packed up my bicycle and set off home. Upon reaching the outdoors, I was immediately struck by a profound sense of apprehension. The wind speed exceeded 20 miles per hour, with gusts reaching over 30 miles per hour. I would only have a limited portion of my 9-mile journey facing the wind or a side wind. During my commute home, I encounter a 1.5-mile downhill segment where I typically achieve a top speed of over 30 miles per hour. However, today, despite my efforts, I was unable to exceed 12 miles per hour. This demonstrates the severity of the wind on that particular downhill segment, which was directly in the wind's path.
Although I may have portrayed this situation as dire, it was indeed a challenging one. While successful rides like these can uplift the spirit, I experienced emotional improvement after showering and resting for the night. Nothing can effectively alleviate negative thoughts and depressive feelings like overcoming a significant challenge. Although this may not be comparable to reaching the summit of Mount Everest, for me, it represented an important milestone in my current physical condition. Gradual progress and self-reward are beneficial practices.
In the realm of photography, with the improved weather conditions, I am eager to engage in my photography endeavors. I recently acquired a new tripod (I desired a taller height to maintain a straight posture). After extensive research, I ultimately selected the Oben CT-3561 tripod, which received recommendations from several individuals. I purchased it through a link provided on the reviewer’s website. Although the cost of $360 was substantial, I am confident that it will be a worthwhile investment. I am still investigating whether reviewers receive compensation for their reviews, but the review was comprehensive and persuasive in my decision-making process.
Additionally, I decided to purchase the Tamron 150-600 lens. This full-frame lens completes my lens collection. While I would have preferred a lower aperture (F5-6.3), the cost was prohibitive. I am eagerly anticipating the opportunity to utilize the extended reach of this lens. I will share some of my work once I have achieved satisfactory results.
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