Vermont Day 2

The first day was pleasant, except for one issue. One of us struggles with geography, while the other relies on a Garmin device. Occasionally, tension arose between the driver and passenger.

Our flight departed at 7:05 PM from Minneapolis, bound for Boston, Massachusetts. A fire in Chicago caused a slight reroute, adding about 15 minutes. The flight was uneventful, except for the unusual cabin pressure that prevented ear popping.

We arrived at the rental car agency, where a line formed. Despite the line, I found it entertaining to watch a man in the 70s, resembling Mr. T junior, with a gold chain necklace, sunglasses, a mouth grill, and a bright red shirt. He looked around with disgust. I suppose I’m mean, but it made the line move faster.

After completing the paperwork, the young man greeted us as if selling insurance. He dressed well and took us to a group of cars, including a Nissan Versa. We insisted on a minivan, but the Versa was below our preference.

We arrived in Montpelier at 6 PM. Checked into the quaint little B&B, ate at Three Pennies Tap Room before getting groceries, and called it a night.

Carry on, my friends, carry on.

Another Month, another life taken

Throughout the morning, I found myself overcome with grief for an individual I had only briefly known. A young man of sixteen had tragically decided that life was not worth continuing and took his own life. This incident brings the total number of individuals I knew personally who have passed away this year to eight. Additionally, there are four individuals I knew of but had no personal connection with who have also taken their own lives.

While I may never fully comprehend the reasons behind such actions, I occasionally question whether I do. I possess an inherent resilience that enables me to perceive situations and approach challenging times in a different way. I have always understood that life is a product of our own choices and actions.

I often encounter a co-worker who’s ill and dissatisfied with his work. He feels undervalued and wants to resign, but he was surprised when I admitted that I have despised my job for the past six months. It’s hard to wake up and come to work, and it doesn’t satisfy me. He said no one would know this, since I always seem joyful and productive.

I endeavored to explain that life is a construct of our own making. I emphasized that I have experienced a profound dislike for running during numerous marathons and longer races I have completed. During my bicycle journey from Denver, Colorado, to Minneapolis, Minnesota, there were instances when I genuinely disliked biking. However, much like life, there are ebbs and flows, and it is our attitude that shapes us during challenging times. Indeed, there is joy in overcoming the difficulties that often arise in our daily lives.

I’m at my lowest point. I know I won’t quit and smile through it, but many acquaintances have found it easier to resign. I may never understand this, and I’m grateful for that. May you never quit and enjoy your life.

Carry on, my friends, Carry on…

Early start and long day

The first day was pleasant, except for one issue. One of us struggles with geography, while the other relies on Garmin. Occasionally, tension arose between the driver and passenger.

Our flight departed at 7:05 PM from Minneapolis, bound for Boston, Massachusetts. A fire in Chicago caused a slight reroute, adding about 15 minutes. The flight was uneventful, except for the unusual cabin pressure that prevented ear popping.

We arrived at the rental car agency, where a line formed. Despite the line, I found it entertaining to watch a man in the 70s, resembling Mr. T junior, with a gold chain necklace, sunglasses, a mouth grill, and a bright red shirt. He looked around with disgust. I suppose I’m mean, but it made the line move faster.

After completing the paperwork, the young man greeted us as if selling insurance. He dressed well and took us to a group of cars, including a Nissan Versa. We insisted on a minivan, but the Versa was below our preference.

Carry on, my friends, carry on.

52 and counting

No, this isn’t my 52nd marathon or day of dieting. I turned 52. As a social experiment, I last used Facebook in June. Before leaving social media, I made my birthday invisible. Last year, I received over 100 Happy Birthday wishes; this year, I've received three. What does that mean? It shows how many birthday wishes you’d get without social media.

I admit, I’m not good at accepting gifts. I feel awkward and try to refuse or reduce what someone wants to give me. It may seem noble, but it’s not. I’m just putting myself ahead of others. During my teenage years, I harbored a strong aversion to receiving gifts from others on my birthdays or Christmas. This aversion stemmed from a desire to avoid potential disappointment, particularly with the recurring theme of receiving plain black socks.

Additionally, it was beneficial to cultivate a sense of detachment from material possessions, as gifts inherently represented tangible items to me. Consequently, I adopted a pessimistic outlook, adopting a somber demeanor and refraining from expressing excessive excitement. Instead, I focused on cherishing the company of those around me.

In retrospect, this approach may be perceived as humble. However, I must admit that I had not fully overcome my desire for material possessions. In fact, my obsession with acquiring items had intensified. The key distinction was that I now possessed the means to purchase them for myself. Furthermore, I approached gifts with a legal mindset rather than being driven by genuine affection.

When receiving a gift, I often fail to consider the effort and thoughtfulness that the giver invested. My focus remained solely on my own feelings and the need to assert my right to refuse the gift. I was unaware of the potential emotional investment the giver may have made in selecting a gift. This behavior extended beyond birthdays, encompassing any gift I received. Each time, the same pattern emerged: “Oh, you shouldn’t have…I cannot accept that, etc.” This situation escalated into a power struggle, and I relished in my dominance. I had never considered the joy and gratitude that a gift could elicit from the recipient.

Why am I discussing receiving gifts? Well, this weekend marked my 52nd birthday. For most of human history, old age has been a symbol of honor. Today, it is a source of apprehension. Fear of deteriorating health. Fear of relinquishing the active lifestyle that brought me happiness. Fear of financial insecurity in retirement. I recall when 52 appeared ancient – and now I am astounded that I have surpassed 50 and am inexorably aging. I once adhered to a rigorous regimen of dietary and exercise habits. I engaged in running five to six days a week, weightlifting, resistance training a few days a week, and core training once a week. I scheduled regular semi-annual medical check-ups to monitor various health indicators (or their absence).

I frequently indulge in excessive eating and consume whatever I desire. Stress often leads me to eat junk food. I am making every effort to combat the relentless passage of time. However, the stresses of life have profoundly altered me!

In celebration of my aging quickly, Shelley made me dinner and took me to a play. We went home afterward and enjoyed a slice of carrot cake. We called it a night, and I woke early to work on the backlog of items they call a job on that duty. Why am I still trying to figure out how to do my best in my profession and let myself go? I often wonder if I could do what others can for easy pay and little stress. But that is like stealing. They leisurely work through the day, reporting for work at 8:00 AM and taking 30 minutes to get ready, and at 4:10 PM, they get everything set so I can bolt out the door at 4:30 without a care.

Today, I received an unexpected and welcome gift—a book. As a nonfiction reader, finding books that interest me can be challenging. This thoughtful gesture left me happy and speechless, unlike other times when I felt pressured to reciprocate.

Oh, the book, it was “What If: Serious Scientific Answers to Absurd Hypothetical Questions,” and it is a book I will be able to read over and over as it is just not a dead read, but a book that makes me think deeply, very deeply.

Carry on, my friends, carry on!

Why I Think This World Should End (2023)

Over the past three months, I have been working excessively long hours, averaging 65 to 70 hours per week. Upon reflection, I discovered that I had only eight days of paid leave in the last ninety days, including Saturdays and Sundays. Consequently, I have been unable to engage in cycling as frequently as I would prefer, and I have had to prioritize self-care.

Although my hands have essentially returned to their normal state following the prolonged ride in May, I genuinely require some personal time. While I am not averse to life, I am experiencing a sense of loss and feeling as though I have sacrificed my well-being for a job that does not adequately recognize my contributions. This situation prompts me to question whether this is the mindset of the dozen individuals I know who tragically took their own lives in recent years.

I saw the video below and watched it—not once, not twice, but six times in a row. It was really impacting, at least to me. We are driven by greed and what it brings to society. That needs to change!!   It is called "Why I Think This World Should End".   https://youtu.be/itvnQ2QB4yc?si=FPU79h51d7mux_52

The text from the video is:

The world is coming to an end! 

The air is polluted. The oceans are contaminated. The animals are going extinct. 

The economies collapsed. Education is shot. Police are corrupt. 

Intelligence is shunned and ignorance rewarded. 

The people are depressed and angry. 

We can't live with each other, and we can't live with ourselves, so everyone's medicated. 

We pass each other on the streets, and if we do speak, it's meaningless robotic communication.

More people want 15 seconds of fame than a lifetime of meaning and purpose because what's popular is more important than what's right. 

Ratings are more important than the truth. 

Our government builds twice as many prisons and schools.

It’s easier to find a Big Mac than an apple. And when you find the apple, it's been genetically processed and modified. 

Presidents lie. Politicians trick us. 

Race is still an issue, and so is religion. Your God doesn't exist, my God does, and he is all-loving. 

If you disagree with me, I’ll kill you or, even worse, argue you to death. 

92% of the songs on the radio are about sex. 

Kids don't play tag; they play twerk videos. The average person watches 5 hours of television a day, and there is more violence on the screen than ever before. 

Technology is giving us everything we could ever want, and at the same time, stealing everything we really need. 

Pride is at an all-time high, Humility is at an all-time low. 

Everybody knows everything. Everybody's going somewhere, ignoring someone, blaming somebody. 

Not many human beings left anymore. A lot of human doings. 

Money is still the root of all evil. Yet we tell our kids Don't get that degree, the jobs don't pay enough. 

Good deeds are only done when there's a profit margin. 

Videos are the misfortunes of others go viral. We laugh and share them with our friends to share the laughter with us. 

Our role models today are people who 60 years ago would have been examples of what not to be. 

There are states where people can legally be discriminated against because they were born a certain way. 

Companies invest millions of dollars hiring specialists to make little girls feel like they need make-up to be beautiful, permanently lowering their self-esteem because they will never be pretty enough to meet those impossible standards. 

Corporations tell us buy, buy, buy! Get this! Get that! You must keep up, you must fit in; this will make you happy, but it never does for long. 

So what can we do in the face of all this madness and chaos? What is the solution? 

We can love, not the love you hear in your favorite song on the radio. I mean real love, true love, the boundless kind. 

You can love. Love each other from the moment we wake up to the moment we go to bed. 

Perform an act of kindness because that is contagious. 

We can be mindful during every interaction, planting seeds of goodness, showing a little more compassion than usual. 

We can forgive because 300 years from now, will that grudge you hold against your friend, your mother, your father have been worth it? 

Instead of trying to change others, we can change ourselves. We can change our hearts. 

We've been soaked in lies. Brain-washed by our leaders and those we trust, and not recognize our brothers and sisters who exhibit anger, hatred, and cruelty, but once we truly love, we will meet anger with sympathy, hatred with compassion, and cruelty with kindness. 

Love is the most potent weapon on the face of the Earth. 

Robert Kennedy once said that few will have the greatness to bend history. Still, each of us can work to change a small portion of events, and in the sum of all those acts, the history of a generation will be written. 

Yes, the world is coming to an end, and the path towards a new beginning begins within you.

Strangely enough, because of our negativity and similar biases, every generation tends to feel as if it is the end of the world. This is why R.E.M.'s song remains just as relevant today as it was when it was released in 1987. We might be thinking, "No, this time it really is worse than ever!" We may be falling prey to the negativity bias by thinking it is. However, there are legitimate reasons to be concerned, and at the same time, hopeful. Please follow me as I explore these topics in this blog series!

To the best of my knowledge, shortness of breath and chest tightness are recurring daily challenges stemming from the inherent stress of life and work. While I do not foresee an imminent resolution to these issues, a solution must still be found, even if it remains elusive. After all, the sky is blue.

Carry on my friends, carry on!