Amateur I am

I enjoy photography and have often shared my photos. I strive to capture scenes and events that evoke thoughts or emotions in viewers. Sometimes, it’s a running event that conveys the athlete’s pain or effort. At other times, it’s a serene waterfall or a natural scene.

This past week, I photographed my girlfriend and her two granddaughters meeting their four-year-old baby sister for the first time. I was nervous about capturing their emotions and getting the perfect image that conveys the feeling.

Below are some of the shots; I am proud of the result.

 

What do you think?  Did they create emotion or thoughts, or are they just another image?

Carry on my friends, carry on!

Stay in place lifted!

Has the Minnesota stay-at-home order been lifted? Is this a prudent decision? There are passionate arguments on both sides of the issue. One perspective draws a parallel to war, suggesting that the affluent will go to great lengths to maintain their wealth, even if it results in loss of life. Another viewpoint questions whether we are obligated to retaliate in the face of aggression. The truth remains uncertain.

This pandemic has been challenging for everyone. I’ve been sensitive to my co-workers’ mental health and tried to support them. But I’m starting to think this lockdown time is making me depressed. Working from home has reduced my average workweek to under 70 hours. Maybe it’s burnout, not depression. My feelings are more than“I feel bad” or “I’m angry.” I feel like I’m trapped in a dark room. I ask myself, “Why don’t you pick yourself up?” But I don’t answer; I only ask.

I totally get that when things don’t go as planned at work or if our leaders aren’t doing their best, it can really bring us down. The daily hustle can be tough on all of us. And it’s no surprise that mental health short-term disability claims are climbing by 10% each year, according to the Center for Workplace Mental Health. The mental toll of a depressed work environment can really add up. Depression is a big reason why we’re not as productive as we could be in the U.S., and I recently read that the annual cost is between $40 and $50 billion.

Studies indicate that employers incur a significant financial loss, amounting to 27 workdays per depressed employee. Notably, two-thirds of this loss is attributed to “presenteeism,” a phenomenon where individuals are physically present at work but exhibit reduced productivity. There is a well-established correlation between work stress and depression. This relationship arises from the acute stress experienced during specific tasks, such as meeting occasional deadlines or delivering significant presentations. These stressors effectively trigger the body’s fight-or-flight response, which can enhance performance. Conversely, chronic stress, characterized by constant deadlines or exposure to high-pressure situations, is associated with depression, cardiovascular diseases, elevated blood pressure, and type II diabetes.

As a supervisor, I recognize the positive impact this initiative has on my team. However, I must acknowledge that my leadership may not always align with this approach. In certain situations, I find myself lacking control as the challenges escalate and the complexities intensify.

In light of these circumstances, I am seeking clarification on the following:

1. Is it advisable for me to return to the office?
2. Is it safe to refuel my vehicle?
3. Is it prudent to visit a medical professional?

I am currently five weeks overdue for my last iron count test. While my anemia has improved, I still require occasional infusions (three last year). I am experiencing a resurgence of low iron levels, leading me to question whether it is safer to refrain from medical attention.

Confusion and instability grow, and I am still trying to figure out the correct answer?

Carry on my friends, carry on!

Family, yea they care?

Over 31 years ago, my ex-wife’s labor began in earnest on an April evening in 1989. Over 30 hours later, a child was born during Murphy Brown. I’ve always wanted to freeze time, capturing the perfection of a toothy giggle or a cozy morning snuggle forever. But such is parenthood: many things are beyond our control, which is both liberating and terrifying. Weekends are a dress rehearsal for empty nest syndrome: the children sleep all day and disappear in the evenings. I wouldn’t know they lived here if they didn’t take money from my pockets.

Fast-forward 31 years, and I’m lonely. My girlfriend preaches about the importance of family, saying my lack of appreciation is unfortunate. But family is important, yet we’re all individuals who prioritize ourselves. My girlfriend’s daughter had a baby girl, which brought her great delight. Despite living in Cincinnati, Ohio, and us in Minnesota, her daughter moved back to Minnesota with joy when her only grandchild was a year old.

Since then, she has welcomed two more grandchildren, which has brought immense joy to her life. She consistently emphasizes the significance of family and describes this period as a heavenly experience. However, she was subsequently informed of their impending relocation to Tennessee. This news deeply saddened my girlfriend, who spent several weeks in a state of emotional distress due to the imminent move. Her happiness diminished significantly, and this has had a profound impact on her well-being. We had briefly discussed the matter, and approximately a month has passed since an old friend reached out to her. During their conversation, she recounted her exceptional time spent with her grandchildren, which prompted her to burst into tears.

I am not much help, as I reminded her of what I said when they moved here. People often prioritize their desires for adventure over their families, leading to eventual departure. She said her family is close, and they would not do that. Now, she's wrong.

I guarantee her grandchildren will be sad not seeing Grammy several times a month. However, it confirms my statement that a family is often secondary to each individual's desires. I've been there, chasing self-improvement and advancement over the family. As I age, I see things differently, and that is a fact.

My primary point in this discussion is to emphasize the inherent uncertainty of life. While individuals may come and go, certain individuals will remain etched in our memories. Physical ailments may subside, and weight loss may appear unattainable. However, the only certainty lies in our ability to shape our destinies, albeit rarely at the expense of our families.

Families have evolved, becoming more distinct from their counterparts of fifty years ago. I am concerned that relationships and family dynamics have declined over the past several decades, and I lack optimism regarding any potential for improvement.

In light of this, I find myself frustrated to witness someone I hold dear frequently shedding tears due to the actions of the individual she typically refers to as the daughter who prioritizes family. While I acknowledge the significance of family, I must admit that I occasionally exhibit a lack of empathy and compassion. Consequently, I have expressed my perspective that the notion of family’s paramount importance is not a reality.

CARRY ON MY FRIENDS, CARRY ON