I’m near job burnout. I’ve worked 70-hour weeks, but I’m ready to work a 40-45-hour week, and people will have to wait. This job stress has been a unique blend of physical, emotional, and mental exhaustion, coupled with doubts about my competence and the value of my work.
Have you become cynical or critical at work? I drag myself to work, struggle to get started, and become irritable with coworkers, customers, or clients. I have low energy, need more satisfaction from my achievements, and have terrible sleep habits. I’m troubled by unexplained headaches, backaches, or other physical complaints.
I have no control over my job. I can’t influence decisions like your schedule, assignments, or workload. We also lack the necessary resources to support your work. Work takes up so much time and effort that I don’t have the energy to spend time with my family and friends.
I identify strongly with my work, which causes an imbalance between my work and personal life. I need to stop trying to be everything to everyone. The consequences are excessive stress, fatigue, insomnia, anxiety, and obesity, all of which increase my stroke risk. I must change before it’s too late.
I won’t finish the 31st consecutive Grandma’s Marathon. There are a few reasons for this decision.
- Firstly, the forecast predicts severe thunderstorms. At the age of 52, I do not require six hours of exertion to complete a marathon in adverse weather conditions.
- I’ve had severe ankle pain since last fall, and physical therapy helped temporarily.
- Lastly, my health is a concern. As I had mentioned on May 29, the doctor diagnosed a bleeding ulcer. Although I have made an effort to improve my health, I have yet to achieve significant progress. Consequently, I decided to schedule a follow-up appointment before the race. The results were unfavorable, and the doctor strongly advised against participating.
Long-term fatigue has many causes, but my hemoglobin level is now very low. I cringe when he calls it anemia. Low hemoglobin may be temporary, but it’s more likely due to internal bleeding that I can’t control. My job is the primary source of stress. I’ve never experienced this level of stress in the past six months, and I don’t see it getting better.
I had held on to Grandma’s Marathon for months, but I ignored the doctor's advice and did it anyway. I want to fail, as the thought of not going is depressing. It makes me wonder what else is there.
All streaks end, but I feel empty. My heart feels ripped from my chest. Maybe it’s my heart that bleeds, not my stomach.
My consecutive finishes at Grandma’s Marathon are over. RIP to the last consistent part of my life.
Comments from my original blog - I merged the blogs.
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