Finally, I escaped the world within a world: Las Vegas. While many people enjoy this vacation destination, I found myself strangely content to depart. Although I arrived home 40 degrees cooler, I did not mind the change. I prefer cooler weather, as it allows for layering, but eventually, there is nothing else to remove.
I have now logged approximately 20 miles per week for two weeks. I have incorporated pool workouts and numerous bike rides into my routine. This week, I plan to run two days a week, as I am concerned about the health of my knee. I intend to participate in the Superior 50 K, but I may walk more than anticipated. This is feasible if I add my walking time, as I have consistently exceeded 30 miles per week for some time. My weight is gradually decreasing in the correct direction.
I recently came across an article about a runner who tragically passed away due to an enlarged heart at the New York City Marathon. This is the second time I have heard of this cause of death. The first was a close friend, Ken Nordquist, and then I reencountered this news. This incident has brought to mind memories and thoughts. I am considering undergoing the heart scan that is often discussed on the radio. What measures should we take to protect ourselves from such risks?
The article mentioned that an athlete like Ryan underwent medical testing in Flagstaff, Arizona, where he trained last spring, and was cleared for running. However, why did this individual succumb to this condition?
The articles stated that an enlarged heart, similar to Ryan’s, can lead to increased endurance. Additionally, USA Today reported that scientists have observed this phenomenon among athletes. Athletes who engage in strenuous sports such as cycling, running, or swimming often develop larger hearts that pump more blood.
One additional consideration in this world teeming with potential threats is the quote I penned previously: “We all need to get busy living or get busy living.” Overthinking potential dangers can hinder our ability to conserve energy for living.
On May 6, I was on a lunch run with younger friends when they discussed a tragic suicide by a 25-year-old Marine. This incident evoked memories of the war stories I heard during my time running with a group of older gentlemen over two decades ago. In the 1980s, I encountered numerous harrowing tales about the war that surpassed those depicted in movies. One runner had a limp and a 25% portion of his left buttock cheek obliterated by an explosion, a memory he will forever carry. Another had a missing lung from a bullet wound.
While I never personally experienced such atrocities, I lived in an era devoid of war. However, these experiences have left me with some indelible mental images. For a 21-year-old raised in rural North Dakota, these stories resemble the elements often incorporated into video games. At times, individuals lose their sense of reality. The prevalence of fiction has led to the normalization of repulsive thoughts that were once considered unacceptable in the 1950s.
As the conversation progressed, they delved into the statistics of suicide. Jan mentioned reading that in 50 years, the suicide rate among individuals aged 20 to 24 had doubled (I verified this data, with the rate increasing from 6.2 per 1,000 in 1950 to 12.1 per 1,000 in 2000). She further noted that this statistic still did not encompass the suicide rates within my age group (Londell’s).
We initiated a discussion on the reasons behind this phenomenon. I made a significant contribution to the conversation by sharing my personal experiences. I explained that the past year has been particularly challenging for me, as I have reached the age of 40 and am undergoing significant life changes. Reading glasses, once a source of amusement, are now essential for my vision, sleep has become more intricate, and so on. As I spoke, I couldn’t help but feel a sense of melancholy.
The conversation then shifted to setting goals and objectives, exploring the concept of the meaning of life. We discussed how our aspirations and objectives evolve. As children, our primary objectives revolve around playing with toys and spending time with friends. During adolescence, we develop romantic aspirations for our first love. As college students, we seek fame and financial success. As parents, we strive to nurture and guide our children into becoming well-rounded individuals. At this juncture, I couldn’t help but contemplate the future.
When parenting ceases, we lose a sense of purpose if we fail to establish new goals. Without purpose, hope dwindles, and desire evaporates. This realization was profoundly thought-provoking and prompted me to reflect on my own experience of divorce years ago. At that time, I was grappling with depression and sought professional assistance. During this process, I wrote a story that I have come to cherish. It recounts an unusual journey of self-discovery and the emergence of purpose. I want to share this story with those who read this blog. The story begins as follows:
I currently have this chair in my living room, and I hate it. It's ugly, big, and takes up too much space. And every time I sit back and lean into it, it damages the wall behind it. I've wasted so much time, money, and energy looking for and buying chairs for that corner of my living room. I've bought ones that look good, but don't last. I've had sturdy ones that don't match the style of my living room. I've gotten them straight off the showroom floor, but they become outdated pretty quickly.
What I want is a comfortable chair that looks nice. Something that enhances the living room's decor. The kind of chair that, when you're having a shitty day, in the back of my mind, I know that my chair will be there when I get home, to lounge and relax. Where I can throw my legs over the arm and read a good book or work for hours comfortably, yet it still looks good too. For instance, when the company comes over, I don't have to dress it up with a throw pillow or anything; it's fine the way it is. Additionally, it requires minimal maintenance, eliminating the need for weekly polishing or Scotchgard treatments. But, as I said, I currently have a terrible chair in my living room that I need to get rid of.
But there's a problem. My son likes that chair; it has sentimental value to him. So I can't just take it to the dump. I'm going to have to store it in the shed or something so my son can play with it when he wants to. However, it's cumbersome and complicated to move, and I still need to relocate it from my living room.
Then, the other day, I was at an antique store, not even looking for a chair, and I saw this one that I liked. I thought, damn, I'm not even looking for a chair right now. I am still determining where I'd put it. But I really like this chair. It has a unique look. It had a classic frame and was well-made. I even like the upholstery, and I would like to take it home and see how it looks in my living room.
Then these two guys walk in work suits, walk up to me, and say, "Sorry, sir, I hope you're not lookin' to buy this chair 'cause it's not for sale." They go on and tell me, "See the shop owner here? Well, he's a bit of a perfectionist, and we came here today to pick up this chair and take it to our warehouse so it can be polished and refinished." The guys go on, telling me how funny it is that the shop owner always does this, and that usually what customers like about the furniture are the flaws - you know, the used look that gives it character. And how often do the items get all scratched up on the way back to the store anyway? The guys tell me they have that chair today, but if I am interested, I may want to check back when it's fixed up.
However, the store owner has two other stores, so there's a market where this chair will end up. I laugh to myself. The guys then tell me that I look a little tired from shopping, and they still have some forms to fill out, so why don't I sit in that chair and try it out for a few minutes while they finish their paperwork? That sounds like a good idea so that I will sit in on it. This chair is comfortable; I like it so far.
Then I remembered it didn't matter because I still had that big, ugly chair in my living room. Even after I removed it, I still had to repair the damage to the wall behind it and paint the area where I'd cleaned the wall. And well, this chair is here today. Remember, it's for sale anyway.
I tell my therapist this, and she says, "How about not having a chair in your living room for now?". "Yeah, I agree". I think I will get some good artwork to hang on the wall for that corner of my living room for now." And" art is good. I really can sit on the floor and enjoy the art. Life can go on without a chair. However, there will be a chair that I will grow old in and, with some luck, die smiling in it.
End of story…
After completing the story, I purchased the artwork and still have it on the wall. It serves as a reminder of the challenging emotional periods I experienced during that time and the thought-provoking events that shaped my life. I am proud that suicide was not one of the thoughts that crossed my mind, but I acknowledge that I gained an understanding of the experience of being lost. I cannot fathom the immense suffering endured by those who were running buddies during the war. I often ponder whether those runs and the open discussions about these issues were the most effective form of therapy for them.
Reflecting on my past, I recall that when I experienced heartbreak during my runs or received rejections, I, or someone else, would feel a sense of relief afterward. This realization reminds me that dwelling on failures hinders our progress. To achieve growth, we must seek new opportunities, which inherently involve the risk of failure. As Matthew Keith Groves wisely states, “Winners lose much more often than losers. Therefore, if you continue to lose but persevere, keep it up! You will find the right path.”
As I awaken on this final weekend of the month, greeted by a sun-filled morning, I am filled with a sense of curiosity about what I am missing. The Superior 50K is scheduled to commence this morning, and many participants anticipate a remarkable day. However, I have an appointment with a specialist regarding my knee pain this Monday.
After a two-week hiatus from running, the pain has resurfaced at a heightened intensity. I am eager to resume my runs, but I am apprehensive about the potential for further complications. While a ten-week healing period is sufficient for natural recovery, it is essential to note that this process does not exclusively occur during running or cycling. Once I am moving, I feel a sense of well-being. Nevertheless, I must refrain from ceasing my physical activity.
Last week, despite completing a six-mile run and taking four Advil, I was still awakened by nighttime pain. I am curious to hear if anyone has any insights or suggestions regarding my situation.
Today, I conducted a test of my two Garmin watches, the 405 and the 305. While the 405 initially presented challenges in terms of comfort due to its solid and intricate watchband, I am hopeful that I may become accustomed to it. The 305, with its antennae on both sides, may require further adjustment. The antennae may be positioned on opposite sides of the watch to accommodate a smaller face. I will provide further insights after conducting additional tests.
During my initial test, I found the auto-download feature to be advantageous, while the charging system was less satisfactory. The distance measurements for both watches were consistent, with the 305 indicating 3.71 miles and the 405 also indicating 3.71 miles. However, the 305 produced significantly different elevation readings compared to the 405.
The elevation charts on the 305 were skewed, particularly when compared to the actual elevation calculated from the construction documents for the paved trails at my office. The 305 recorded a 970-foot gain (210 out and 660 back) and an 885-foot loss (630 out and 255 back). In contrast, the 405 recorded a 645-foot gain (540 out and 105 back) and a 638-foot loss (103 out and 535 back). The official plans indicate a total of 662 feet of gain and loss based on the two-foot contours.
I am intrigued by the discrepancy between the software and technology used in both watches. I intend to switch wrists to observe if this makes a difference.
The NCAA tennis season has concluded. While tennis officiating is an enjoyable hobby for me, it can become challenging when there are multiple consecutive weekends of intense tennis matches. Therefore, I will be traveling to Hilton Head next week to enhance my chair skills. I anticipate a fulfilling experience.
Spring has arrived, and the outdoors has become considerably more enjoyable. The pool is now open, and I have been cycling most days as a means of commuting. Given the current gasoline prices, I save approximately $70 per month while simultaneously engaging in physical exercise.
Last week, I consulted a specialist regarding my knee. While the examination did not reveal any alarming findings, it also did not yield any positive results. I emphasized the advantage of the injury in that I was able to identify its onset precisely 10 weeks ago, eliminating the possibility of overtraining as a contributing factor. The injury persists similarly to a severe sprain. Consequently, we opted to pursue the HGH injection option rather than scheduling an MRI examination immediately. I have refrained from running throughout the week, and my knee has not experienced any discomfort. However, I did take a two-week hiatus, and the discomfort remained absent.
I have found some amusement in testing the 405 against the 305. (Garmin) Initially, I harbored a strong aversion to the 405, primarily due to the frustration of unfamiliar settings and the challenges of navigating the Garmin Connect online platform. Numerous errors plagued the synchronization with the online system. Subsequently, I decided to import the data into the Training Center, which proved to be a more satisfactory solution. I once again found the topography to be significantly more accurate with the 405. As previously mentioned, this may seem counterintuitive, but there must be a rationale for obtaining more precise readings.
I eagerly anticipate my next running session. I am hopeful that the injections will suffice, but I remain apprehensive. I will approach each day with caution and focus on managing my expectations.
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