No structure

I dislike disciplining the kids, but it's part of raising them to become adults. It’s harder when Shelley and I have opposite approaches to raising children. Since we both have successful kids, I believe both methods are correct, just like oil and water when adults apply their methods simultaneously on the same child.

On top of that, Shelley has her nighttime routine, so to accommodate her, I need to sleep with less than 2.5 feet of space on the queen bed at Allison’s. I typically have one arm and part of one leg hanging off the side of the bed. This makes sleep VERY difficult, but at least I do not disrupt her very essential sleep process. I also need earplugs because she snores, wear an eye mask because she needs the ceiling fan on high, and double layers because she needs the window open when it's 30 degrees outside. In addition, the CPAP air is frigid, so I need to place a heating element in the bedroom near my body to warm the air and reduce lung irritation.

I woke up at 6:30 AM today to bake cinnamon rolls for the kids. I made a mistake by not reading the directions last night, which said they should be started at room temperature, making the cooking time an hour longer. I had to improvise with the stovetop and microwave. As a result, they ended up too dark. Not burned, but close, and they had way too much cinnamon. They did not go over well! Oh well, Shelley made sure to let me know I failed.

Maeve was a handful this morning. She demanded the iPad Faye had, tried to call her mother to say we weren't nice, and refused to eat. Shelley just let her be on her own, pouting in the laundry room, making noises. I eventually had enough and carried Maeve, kicking and screaming, to the table where we made her sit until it was time for the bus. It was quite a scene! We set breakfast in front of her, but she kept up her bad behavior, and Shelley brushed it off.

Once she settled down, she ate a light breakfast and then headed to the bus as needed. We took Jack to school and arrived exactly at nine, but the process for incoming kids was slow. It wasn't until 9:20 AM that we finally unloaded Jack. I came back and took a quick nap before going to the club to lift weights. I returned and cleaned the patio and the garage before we had to leave to pick up Jack.

We took Jack to Crockett Park Playground again. He met a boy about a year older, Grant, and they played really hard. I was disappointed because I had a great video of them on the slide, but it somehow didn't save. Such a bummer, as it was a really good one.

We reached home by 4:00 PM and went through the post-school routine again. After dinner, we played Right-Left-Center. At 7:00 PM, Shelley took Jack for a bath; Faye watched a movie on the iPad; and Vera and Maeve went into the cold tub (Vera for 12 minutes and Maeve for 6 minutes), then into the hot tub. After 15 minutes in the hot tub, I told them to come out, but they refused. I told them again, but they refused.

Since Shelley disapproved of how I supervise the children, I told her they were in the hot tub and wouldn't get out, and it is her problem. Shelley came into the bedroom, upset with me for going to bed, so I went back outside.

It turned out Maeve and Faye were once again going into the cold tub, and Maeve said, "Grammy said they can." Shelley and I argued again, and I angrily told them they lied to Grammy and to get in the house. They didn’t listen, so I left it to Grammy. Grammy let them continue in the hot tubs, and I just shook my head.

Maeve seems to enjoy pushing buttons, and Vera asserts her independence. I don't know how she behaves when we're not around, but Maeve is not a pleasant child. She's very manipulative and becomes angry when boundaries are established, which makes things much more difficult. 

What makes it more complicated is that the widening child-rearing gap between Shelley and me is growing. I am reaching the point of reevaluating my future with Shelley. When we're around the children, we argue more than ever because she hates how I do things and often criticizes me. In fact, that was happening at home, too. I clean the kitchen, and then she comes and does it again. I vacuum, and she points out where I missed a crumb. I put things in the pantry and fridge in a way that makes sense to me, and she tells me I am wrong. This whole situation has me reevaluating my involvement with Shelley and the grandkids, as she lets them run all over her, and I keep trying to set boundaries. Shelley is doing more to bring me down, to make herself feel better.

I need to reconsider future trips involving kids if I stay in this relationship. It was 9:45 PM before I finally went to bed without a word to Shelley. 

Carry on my friends, Carry on!